Feedback Thoughts from a People Pleaser
(Found on the Feedback Padlet on Canvas)
For as long as I can remember, I have been a people person. It's part of who I am, and I wouldn't want it any other way. However, reading through all of these articles, I realized that sometimes I let people pleasing get in the way of how I view myself and my successes and challenges.
Growing up, I played club soccer for 12 years in the North Texas area. Soccer is already an intense sport, but the culture of it in this area made that intensity feel like it was on steroids. It was all about who had the most showcase invites, what team was going to have the most college commits, and other artificial milestones. As a result of this, I found myself consistently on edge and terrified of missing the mark. If a game went by and I didn't score a goal, I immediately viewed myself negatively. I found it hard to balance realistic goals with unrealistic expectations of myself, and once I came to school, that bled over into how I handle my academics. However, being able to realize that I was the only one putting this immense pressure on myself, I started to understand that I was in control of how I handled my responsibilities.
One of the most impactful thing someone has shared with me while I voiced my fears and concerns about myself to them is the saying: "You would never talk about a friend the way you are talking about yourself." I found that so empowering because it's true. If one of my friends were to come to me talking about themselves negatively, I would immediately reassure them that they are incredible just the way they are. So why should we treat ourselves any different? All of the little things we pick out about ourselves that we don't like or that we find not fitting are really only visible to us. We need to extend grace out to ourselves just as freely as we do to others and understand that self-care isn't just doing face masks and watching TV; self-care is loving yourself even when you don't feel like it and understanding that each bump in the road is still keeping us on track to our great journey.
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